I wish I could say it is you, but then I’d be lying… and that’s just not cool.
Twitter has overwhelmed me. Somewhere along my path I came to believe that in order to be a kool kid on Twitter I needed to follow everybody who follows me.
Now I’ve come to the conclusion that “reciprocal following” is a really, really BAD idea. The main reason is…
Dumbass Spammers. Ugh. These profiles consist of nothing more than some BS about how they are making Quadrillions of dollars through the latest MLM scam, magical berries, or real estate. Why would I willingly follow you? These guys just take advantage of folks who autofollow in hopes that their message of riches will cut through the clutter.
Guess what? When I get 27 messages that all say:
…it makes me crazy!
What is that anyway? How is that adding value? Some poor schmuck is getting that in their “Mentions” tab, and somehow you expect that to help your cause?
Trust me, I’ve already figured out the “make money online” thing, and it’s working fine for me. Plus, there are a precious few other guys and gals I listen to when it comes to helping me earn more.
I’m not turning to Twitter strangers for that, especially not someone who goes by the a cheezy name and doesn’t even have a real picture of themselves in their profile. Puleeeze.
Signal vs. Noise. Somehow I managed to build up a following of 8,370 people (as of today, but I’m sure once I’m done with my evil plan that will drop precipitously).
I can’t possibly follow all those tweets, and was just wearing my follower count as a badge of honor. Tweetdeck updates whiz by so fast I’d have to do this just to keep track – and I don’t want to!
Last month I used refollow to stop following anyone who had the keywords “porn”, “MLM”, “money”, “affiliate” and a few other keywords in their name… Then I went back through and deleted people who didn’t use real images for their profile.
Now I’m taking drastic measures. This morning I kicked off the script at CloudAppears to unfollow everyone… including you.
Then I’m going to slowly add people back.
So, if you follow me, there’s a good chance I might not follow you back.
Please don’t be offended.
…and don’t get me wrong, either!
I am truly, honestly thankful for each and every Twitter follower – aside from the spammers and scammers I’ve mentioned above (y’all can go to hell!). For those of you who stay with me, I promise to do my best to continue to provide useful, fun, provocative and amusing tweeets.
Trying to tell me how to get a free iPod ain’t gonna work. 
Am I right? Am I wrong? Can you change my mind? anything’s possible… lemme know in the comments.
